identity

Golsa Shafa , 2T3 PB

Artist statement:

This poem is about the outlook of a patient after having a stroke. The patient survived but is mourning the loss of her identity – her identity before the stroke. My aim was to draw attention to a patient’s quality of life and sense of identity, which can be lost after any traumatic event.

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The numbness in my face in a beat of a heart.

My senses collapse, my vision turns dark.

Words get stuck at the traffic in my brain.

What I wish I had was a stroke—but of luck.

They managed my stroke, my healthcare team.

Grateful for being saved, but I wanted to scream.

Despite being given the gift of going back to life,

All I had in mind was a rather distant dream.

My identity is gone, and I mourn a loss.

The person I was before, how everything was.

Out of touch with the normal version of myself.

And a voice in my head says, “You’re a lost cause.”

The numbness in my heart, in the span of years

Has made me reflect on what used to be hers.

Strong strides, eloquent speech, and a voice

That touched the soul of her family and peers

They managed my stroke, the heroes not in capes.

Thinking about their work is all that it takes

To bring me back to this new identity and smile.

Although, its paint is gray, and I see its flakes.