Interview with Chaithanya Nair
Chaithanya Nair is a first year medical student at the University of Toronto. She grew up in Singapore, Qatar and Canada. Music was one thing she always carried with her as she traveled through these vividly different nations. She really enjoys singing and listening to music from all genres and languages, but she does have a particular interest in Indian classical music. She has been learning Carnatic music, a type of Indian classical music, from a very young age, and it has been a defining part of her identity ever since.
Q: Tell me a little bit about yourself and your music.
Hello, I'm Chaithanya Nair. I'm a first year medical student at U of T. Outside of school, I really enjoy talking to friends and family, watching movies, and of course, listening to music. I enjoy singing and listening to music from all genres and languages, but I do have a particular interest in Indian classical music. I've been learning Carnatic music, which is a specific type of Indian classical music, from a very young age, and it has been a way for me to remain connected to my Indian cultural roots. Being an immigrant, it's easy to lose yourself in the battle of cultures going on in your head, and music helped define my identity as an Indo-Canadian.
Q: How did your interest in classical Indian music start, and why did you decide to start singing, in particular?
My parents are big music enthusiasts, and my mom was a really good vocalist. So, they were the ones who really wanted me to learn Indian classical music. My mom was actually my first guru, which is basically a teacher. She taught me the basics of Carnatic music. Later, I attended music classes at a local cultural center. At first, I wasn’t too enthusiastic about it and didn't really enjoy the classes. As I grew older and learned more compositions, however, I began to appreciate Carnatic music a lot more and see just how beautiful it is. Some of the compositions were about contentment while others were about devotion, and when I immersed myself in the melody, I could feel the emotion that the piece was talking about. I thought, “Wow, this is all so amazing.” I found that I could just lose myself in a song’s story, and that was a really beautiful feeling. I think that feeling was what made me want to continue singing.
Q: That’s so nicely said. How much training did you do and what special skills did you need to hone for this specific kind of music?
I moved around a lot during my childhood, so my training has been pretty fragmented. I started music classes when I was four. My guru at the time was Shyama, and this was in Singapore. When my family moved to the Middle East, my training was interrupted, and I restarted after a couple of years with my guru, R Jayalekshmi. We then moved to Canada, so my training was interrupted for a second time. Now, I train under Kottarakara Sivakumar, who has been my guru for the past seven years. It’s quite interesting because I do online classes, and I haven't seen my guru in-person yet, which is pretty crazy. In terms of what classes entail, typically, my guru teaches me a composition by going through it line by line, and I’ll sing it after him. As for skills, there’s a lot of basics that you build on, just like in Maths, where you need to know addition, subtraction, and multiplication to do higher level operations. You first need to know how to sing at the right pitch and at the right tempo, but with my training being very discontinuous, that has been one of the drawbacks. My basics are not as strong as they could have been if my training was uninterrupted. So, my current teacher also focuses on building these basic skills during every class.
Q: What do you hope to inspire in people, or maybe within yourself, with your music and your performances?
This is super cliché, but I just hope to send a message of being yourself, fearlessly and unapologetically. When I arrived in Canada, I used to be really shy and embarrassed to sing for others or even say that I was learning music. I felt that set me apart, and I just wanted to blend in and feel like I belonged within the community here. Projecting something that was different about me went against that. What I did not realize back then was that I was attempting to sacrifice a part of my identity just to be accepted by others. Looking back, I regret that mindset. I hope to use music as a tool to propagate the message that you don't have to be the same as everybody else. You can be your own self and be comfortable being your own self and proud of who you are.
Q: Were there times where the pressure to assimilate was hard to work against?
One of the major struggles I feel that all immigrants face, and for me personally, is the question of “How Indian am I?” or “How Canadian am I?” I don't know where I fall on that spectrum. There's a lot of pressure to just be normal. Even when picking my songs, I sometimes feel that I’m choosing more Indo-Western songs rather than completely Indian ones just because I want to appeal to a certain audience. When I lived in Calgary, I struggled with remaining true to my cultural roots because I didn't really have a community there. There wasn’t much opportunity to express my culture. But coming to Ontario, I found a bit more of a community here and more opportunities to perform. I even started volunteering to teach kids short songs that they can sing whenever they're tired. So, moving to Ontario was definitely an upgrade in terms of expressing my culture. Sometimes it still gets tricky, and I have a big debate inside my head: “Should I do this? Should I do that?” But at the end of the day, staying true to my culture is really important to me, because if I don't, it almost feels like I'm turning into a person that I can't recognize, and that troubles me a lot. One way or another, I'll find a way to come back. My parents also helped me a lot with that because they’ve moved around a lot more than I have, so they impart their wisdom to me and share a lot of techniques for staying grounded.
Q: You participated in the 2T5 O-Week talent show performance, and yours was truly a standout act. Why did you decide to sign up?
It’s funny, I was actually not planning to sign up, mainly because I didn't have time to record a video. I also wasn't sure if my fellow medical students would enjoy Indian music. My roommates and my parents encouraged me to sign up. My dad was actually really sad when I said I wasn't going to do it. So, the day before the talent show, my mom convinced me to send a video in. This was a video that I had recorded a couple of months ago and released on Facebook, so I wasn't sure if Team NEURO would accept it, but they were kind enough to do so even though it was way past the deadline. In hindsight, it was a really good decision because I made a couple of friends that way, and a lot of people still recognize me just from the talent show. It’s really amazing, and something that I did not expect at all.
Q: When you prepare for a performance like that, what parts do you find to be the most challenging and the most enjoyable?
With the pandemic, I have not been able to perform as much since in-person events have not been held. So, I’ve switched to recording cover songs instead of doing live performances, and I find that even though it’s a lot of work, I do enjoy it. The first step is to pick a song that matches my skill level and is appropriate for the occasion. I'd say this is the most enjoyable step because I get to listen to a lot of songs until I select one. Sometimes there’s also music videos which are very entertaining to watch. It’s a good break. Once I'm done picking a song, I spend some time listening to it to familiarize myself with the melody. Occasionally, I get very impatient, and I just want to get to the singing part, so I just get started on learning the melody. I'd say that's the most challenging part because it takes a lot of patience and resilience to understand and replicate all the nuances in a song. Sometimes, I have to go on YouTube and slow down a video to 0.75x and listen to the song at that speed just to understand what notes they're singing. That entire process can be really tiring, but it's also very rewarding when you get the finished result out of all of that effort. The process of learning a song can stretch over multiple days. Other times, when I'm in the mood, I just don't take off my headphones until I'm done. So, it really depends on what mood I'm in, which is not a great thing. It should be more consistent, but that's how it works for me. Once that's done, I keep practicing until it's showtime, if it's a live performance. If it's for a cover song, the next step is to record. That’s been quite fun actually because I've been experimenting with a microphone I recently got. I'm trying to figure out how to use it to make a good quality recording. I'm also trying to figure out how to use GarageBand and different softwares to record a cover song. I'm not good with technology at all, so it's been quite a ride, but it's fun. It's fun hearing your voice in that studio recording quality. I always think, “Oh wow, I sound so different”.
Q: How important is the role of instrumentals in classical Indian music and in your music, specifically?
Typically, Indian classical music is presented with a lot of accompanying instruments. You usually perform with a percussion accompaniment called a mridangam. That’s a South Indian instrument that you usually see with Carnatic vocal performances. There’s also some kind of melodic accompaniment like a flute, violin, or veena, which is also an Indian instrument. In terms of how it changes the music, pairing instruments with the vocals adds a lot to the song and can completely change its character. Sometimes, the feeling that a song conveys is closely intertwined with the background music. Without that, the song itself almost sounds incomplete. Adding instruments renders that sense of completeness to the vocals, which is something that's really important to the listener and to the vocalist because you get the full experience of listening to the song. I also play the bamboo flute, called a bansuri, and the violin. I find that learning instruments has actually enhanced my skill as a vocalist. By learning the same type of music through different mediums, I gain a more complete understanding of the music.
Q: How do you decide what instrument will accompany your performance, since you’re familiar with so many
Typically, the only instrument I use with my cover songs is something called a tanpura. It’s essentially an instrument that establishes the pitch of a song, and it’s a staple for all Carnatic compositions. Playing that instrument in the background shows that your song is at the correct pitch and not veering away from it. I think that's a really important component in terms of presenting the song in a beautiful and appropriate manner. [A tanpura] would be my only permanent accompaniment. I don't tend to use other accompaniments because I don't have access to a lot of them. That’s something I'd love to do in the future. Maybe with more connections I can find a percussion artist who can accompany my vocals.
Q: Music is described as a universal language. Many students who attended the talent show may have never listened to classical Indian music before, and yet were still very touched by your performance. Why do you think your music connected so strongly with people?
First of all, that's just a pleasure to hear. I didn't think my music could have that kind of an impact, and it’s great to hear that it does. I think the reason people can have that experience with unfamiliar music is that sometimes the message of a song is conveyed in its melody and not necessarily in its lyrics or their meaning. Sometimes, just listening to the arrangement of notes sends a certain message or imparts a certain feeling that can be just as powerful as understanding the lyrics. That unspoken communication can foster a deeper bond than those formed with just words.
Q: How do you feel that this artistic endeavor adds to your life?
I think it plays a huge role in defining my identity. It's a way for me to stay connected to my Indian cultural roots. This is very important to me because, while I've actually never lived in India, both my parents are from India. Our culture, our family, our traditions…everything is Indian. Even so, remaining connected to India without being in India is quite a task, and I think music helps me accomplish that task. Secondly, music is a way for me to temporarily step out of all the chaos and stress of life and cleanse my mind before returning to my daily activities with a fresh mindset. It gives me an opportunity to recharge myself. So, when I come back, I'm more capable of handling stress and difficult situations than I would have been if I hadn't taken a moment to step away.
Q: Many people think that science and art are two very different or opposing fields. You are here as both a medical student and as an artist. How do you reconcile those two sides of yourself?
With medicine, even when we’re interacting with standardized patients in our clinical skills classes, we're always told to read body language or listen to how a patient is speaking in order to understand what emotions they're trying to convey. That’s kind of similar to how the melody of a song speaks to the message it's trying to convey. It almost trains you to read the underlying message rather than what's being presented, so you can get a better idea of it. It helps you delve deeper into a situation, whether it's understanding the concerns of a patient or understanding the message of a song. It's all about reading beyond the surface.
Q: Do you find that your music enhances your role as a medical student and will eventually enhance your role as a doctor?
I definitely do think so. It's a huge way for me to manage my stress and a moment of calm in my life that I believe is essential to becoming a good doctor. If you feel chaotic inside, it's difficult to render any kind of calmness to your patients. Having a pathway in my life to relieve stress is always a good thing, especially since being a medical student and a doctor are both associated with heavy responsibilities and high stress levels. Besides that, I believe that music therapy is becoming a big deal. In Carnatic music, you have different notes called swaras, and different arrangements of these notes create ragas. Ragas are supposed to be sung at a particular time of the day, and when sung in a particular arrangement, they send a message of a particular emotion. One of these ragas is called anandabhairavi, and it has actually been linked to helping with hypertension. I'm not sure if there's solid scientific evidence supporting that, but these things make me think there's a possible future where I can blend both the medical student or doctor side of me and the musician side of me.
